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What Would Bale Do

An ongoing exploration of the dark and gritty reboot

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20Aug 202223 Oct 2023
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An Investigation into Halloween’s Satanic Origins

Diving Deeper into Halloween, Satan, and the Allegations Made in Nathan Fielder’s The Rehearsal Let’s start with one thing: I…

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16Oct 202131 Aug 2023
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Every Large Adult Son on Succession, Ranked

Who is Succession’s Number One Boy? (My Version of Those “Every Succession Character, Ranked” Articles) This is my guide to…

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22Feb 201920 Sep 2024
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Gregg Turkington, Tim Heidecker, Ant-Man & Metafiction

Or: Is the MCU a Meta Narrative Within the On Cinema at the Cinema Universe? Note: this article has been…

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2016…

The World Needs Bad Men: Bush, Trump, and the Anti-Hero

22 Jan 20174 Oct 2022
How the Bush Era Caused the Anti-Hero Wave that Gave Rise to Trump Toward the finale of the 2016 election, Mike Huckabee took to Fox News to give a defense…
Books…

Stop Misquoting Leonard Cohen and Ernest Hemingway. Start Listening and Reading.

12 Jan 201711 Sep 2023
The world breaks every one... or does it? Consider the misquote. It lies in that same realm as citing fake news or reading only the headline. Misquoting is certainly nothing new,…
Books…

Why This Website Displays No Ads

7 Jan 20177 Jan 2017
You may wonder—or perhaps you may not—why this blog displays no ads. Nothing encouraging you to go to other sites, nothing in this margins, nothing at the bottom of the…
2016…

The True Theme of 2016: Never Meet Your Heroes

28 Dec 201611 Apr 2019
Hating 2016 and wishing for it to end has perhaps been the meme of 2016. It has been called a dumpster fire and was declared to "even sucked for Kim Kardashian." Beginning…
Christopher Nolan…

What We Talk About When We Talk About Fan Theories

21 Nov 20167 Mar 2023
Note: this article was first written in 2016 but has been updated several times over the years, especially as things have changed and evolved.  I've been trying to write this…
Books…

Twelve Questions and Answers About The Moonborn (with No Spoilers)

19 Nov 201620 Nov 2016
I've received a number of questions about The Moonborn: or, Moby-Dick on the Moon, my novel that came out on Monday, November 14th. While I love getting questions about it,…
Bale…

The Best Moby-Dick Homages, Adaptations, and Celebrations

14 Nov 20165 Apr 2024
Note: this article has been updated since it was first published. Happy Birthday, Moby-Dick! Not the whale, but the book. 165 years ago today, Herman Melville's epic novel was published…
Bale…

The Best Kurt Vonnegut Books to Start With

11 Nov 201631 Aug 2023
A Beginner's Guide & Recommended Vonnegut Reading Order, Including which are "the best" Vonnegut books There has never been a better time to start reading Kurt Vonnegut. To begin with,…
Fan Theories…

Is Hannibal Buress the Architect of Eric Andre’s Pain? A Fan Theory

25 Sep 20162 Dec 2022
If you aren't familiar with it, The Eric Andre Show is a post-modern talk show starring Eric Andre and Hannibal Buress, two comedians who are either parodying a late night…
Batman…

The Short Story I Wrote Inspired by Wes Anderson and Carlos Castaneda

19 Sep 201619 Sep 2016
You may have noticed this blog's recent lowered activity. Nothing new since early August, with only a handful of new posts since the beginning of summer. What is the deal,…

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